Saturday, April 03, 2004

Hope springs eternal


I took an Ambien at bedtime last night and slept like a rock. I had a harder-than-usual time feeling awake this morning, though. Usually I feel awake right away, it's just getting body to cooperate that's difficult. So tonight I'm going to try a half and see how that goes.

I also took my first Plaquenil dose today, and perhaps it is the placebo effect but I'm feeling pretty good. Maybe it is a side effect of relatively clean eating these last few days (very little high carb junk, no soy). It was a very wet day here, it actually poured off and on all day, and the clouds didn't start blowing out until late in the evening. Normally I would be in agony on a day like today, but my hands are holding steady at around a 3, and my feet and ankles are somewhere around 1-2. That is simply outstanding. I hope it continues, it's nice to feel like a normal person again.

It is difficult to convey how being in pain all the time affects me. Unless you have dealt with chronic pain, or even a constant pain over a shorter period of time -- say, a couple of weeks -- you're just not going to understand. It wears on you. More precisely, it sucks the life out of you and makes many things that should not be a struggle, seemingly impossible.

This morning, for example, was close to a disaster... I poured DD's juice and then promptly (stupidly) knocked it off the counter. It was like the Exploding Soda Can Mess all over again, only this time it was all over the fridge. Fortunately it wasn't all that much juice. However, cleaning up the tile is murder on my back, knees, ankles... everything. And the reason I knocked it over was because my coordination is just off in the morning until everything loosens up a bit. Then there's the fact that I couldn't open the milk... but you get the idea. Some of DD's shirts have buttons at the back neckline with elastic loops instead of buttonholes. They're f'ing tiny, and they always, always take me 3 or 4 tries. One of these days I will have to tell her to ask her brother to do it! Or maybe not, if these meds really do work... what a nice thought.

DD's cheerleading was cancelled for tomorrow morning because we had planned to cheer at football, and all the football games were cancelled because of today's rain (the fields will be a mess). I could've suggested we go to basketball instead, but didn't bother. There doesn't seem to be a lot of enthusiasm just yet, I don't know if there ever will be. I should've volunteered to be squad leader because I know I could do a better job, but it's just as well that I'm not...

Didn't hear anything from Princeton Review today. Shoot, I should've sent out little thank you notes! I'll do that first thing tomorrow.

Little by little I am getting stuff done. I did fold the laundry. Wait, let me pause a moment and mourn the loss of 2 or so hours of my life wasted on the horrible movie Cold Creek Manor. How could Sharon Stone agree to play such a stupid character? Eeesh. Stupid, stupid movie. So that was something that got done that didn't need doing! Ahem. I also toted up the kids' money so now I know how much they have to spend: too much. We will put some into their savings accounts, just haven't decided how much to put in, yet. We're going to wait until after Easter, they will probably rake in some cash from someone (not us).

DS2 is doing great with the bathroom thing now. He really "gets it". YAY!

I want to get everything ready for the Wednesday stuff pickup this weekend, maybe even tomorrow, so I can start working on DD's furniture. I really need to put some time into my paying work, too -- at least a status report, if not more actual writing... I have a ton of work to do!

Right now, at least, it's all good...

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