Monday, October 09, 2006

still no news

The mind reels with possibilities.

1. The biopsy results have not been returned to the surgeon's office yet. -Unlikely, since he expected them before the end of last week.

The surgeon is out of town, and his staff lady told me that he calls in every day to discuss test results and other business. Which presents these possibilities:

2. The surgeon didn't call in today. - No way.

3. The staff lady didn't get a chance to discuss my results with the surgeon, either because he was pressed for time or because they came in after he called. - Possible, but not likely.

The nice staff lady told me that she specifically cannot release test results unless the doctor explicitly gives her permission to do so. In other words, if there's some discussion that needs to take place, the doctor is going to make the call himself. That presents:

4. They discussed my results but she forgot to ask about calling me to so I could get them asap. - No way. She razzed me about freaking out, and then assured me she would do what she could so I could settle down all the anxious family.

5. They discussed my results and the doctor wants to talk them over with me himself, which means I have to wait for him to get back. - A definite possibility.

Of course, #5 means bad news.

Unfortunately I have no idea when the doctor is getting back. All I can do is wait. (But in an effort not to drive myself crazy thinking about this today, I did a ton of errands all day and then cooked all evening. I'm doing OK.)

A thought flashed just now, Won't I feel silly if/when I get a call telling me that the biopsy was negative? No, I won't. This is something that could go either way. The recommendation on the mammogram/ultrasound report was "BI-RADS: 4 - suspicious abnormality - biopsy should be considered." That doesn't sound too bad, until you look at the recommendation hierarchy, and see that the only thing worse is BI-RADS 5. A 4 indicates "a finding has a definite probability of being malignant," whereas 5 is used when "a finding has a high probability of being cancerous." What's the difference between "definite" and "high"?

Big enough; "definite" gives me a lot more room for hope.


nina said...

Glad you posted. Checked all day.

You know, of course, that you wont be satisfied with talking to the doctor -- you already know that a biopsy is likely. Breast biopsies are so routine -- they give the only truly reliable results. I have had maybe half dozen in the course of my life, all around your age.
My mother had breast cancer. She was coasting on the possibility of good news, ever hopeful until the final reading of a biopsy which did finally indicate a malignancy. She did not freak then, but she did at a delayed reaction. So being in tune with your feelings throughout is not a bad thing.
My mother was sure that the cancer would be with her the remaining years of her life. It wasn't. She had surgery exactly thirty years ago. She's fine. (Physically. She's got other issues, but they are not cancer related, they're dealing with people related.)
Good luck!

Tracey said...

I've been checking every day to see if you got an answer yet. I know what you are going through with all the possibilities. Keeping busy isn't a bad thing at all. What ELSE does one do at times like this? Wallowing just takes us to a bad place, so baking and other things are a good substitute. I'll keep checking in to see what happens. Here's a hug {{{{Joan}}}}