not where I should be

By rights, I should be looking forward to this 3-day weekend.  I mean, I just finished grading my 7th graders' not-too-wretched geology papers, and that was the last thing I had to grade before diving into grading science project reports.  I actually kept up this week!

That's a minor miracle, especially since I've been off the T3 all week with no appreciable side effects.  I've been feeling slightly more creaky, but that comes with the territory of, say, sitting for hours on the couch, grading on my laptop.  I tweaked my right arm disposing of some old furniture some time ago, and most of the time it doesn't even hurt anymore (I just have to remember not to put any muscle into pulling with that arm, because that just makes it hurt again.)  I've also somehow messed up something in my right leg; it hurts behind my knee if I keep it straight and try to touch my toes.  So I don't!  I've been good about keeping up with my other exercises and I think that's one reason I'm staying mobile. 

The reason I was on the T3 in the first place was to try and keep a handle on the (apparent) auto-immune crap that was attacking me.  I'm willing to admit now that I have no idea what was going on back then.  But I can put my rings on every morning, and that was impossible 15 years ago.

Amazingly, my energy levels are fine, my focus is fine (cf. my ability to get all my grading done this week), and blessedly, my digestion is fine.  Sleep... not the best, I have to admit, but not so bad, either.  And I may as well finally write this one out:  inner tremors seem to have increased, to about one a week, still almost always at night but I had one this evening while I was waiting in the car for DS1 to finish an errand.  I'd say it was just the car, but it was off, and all the cars around me were parked and empty, and there was no one driving by. It's a very disconcerting feeling, like everything inside is shaking ever-so-slightly.  It might be time for another round of research on it, since last time I didn't find anything I can remember, from which I deduce that I didn't find anything useful.

I applied for my passport this week!  DH and I are planning a quick trip up to Canada this summer, but once I have a passport, all sorts of other possibilities open up...

Really I'm just feeling sorry for myself and a little bit angry about having my long weekend interrupted with a robotics tournament on Sunday and ending with a brain MRI on Monday.  The nice nurses from Banner MD Anderson called me today, twice.  I told the first nurse I have tiny veins so they usually need to use the ultrasound to place the IV for the MRI contrast.  A couple of hours later, a second nurse called me back to suggest that, since I need labs in the morning, I go early to the lab and have a nurse there both place the IV and do the blood draw, saving me a stick.

If you have never been through anything like this, you won't realize how wonderful this small act of kindness really is.  For surgery, anesthesiologists usually just give me a pediatric IV which they can place pretty easily in my wrist.  But for the brain MRI, they have to infuse the contrast at a rate which the pediatric IV can't meet (it's too small for that rate of through-put), so they have to find a bigger vessel, which involves going deep.  The entire process is simultaneously cool -- the technology is pretty amazing -- and painful.   My blood draws have all been bad lately, too. No matter how hydrated I am the tech just says, "Let's go with the back of your hand," which hurts a disproportionate amount.  But now at least on Monday they can place the IV and do the draw from there, so at least I'll be spared a little bit.   I hate MRIs, though.  I feel like I'm in a coffin being used for target practice -- all the clicks and bangs feel exactly like I'm being shot at.  Fortunately I'm not in there for very long and I'm not (so far) the panicking type. 

I'm feeling a lot of pressure to enjoy tomorrow, my only real day off.  I wish I weren't so ridiculous!