very far

... from any place of peace, right now.

Kids yelling at me all morning: make my breakfast! I'm hungry! do this! do that! Mo-oommmm! He called me a baby!

I am not your servant.
Followed by the usual blah-blah on respect, lack of; see examples just given.

I'm happy -- really happy -- to do things for and with my children. I despise it when they trample what I do for and with them into the dirt, though. When I have been hounded for "cheesy eggs" which then sit congealing on the plate, untouched, my patience drains away quickly. It's a bad way to start the day.

Lunch wasn't much better:
"Wash my hands!" DS2 commands me, which is just ridiculous; he is more than capable of washing them himself. I tell him, "Wash your own hands!" I am cleaning up the lunch prep during this.
"Are you finished eating?" I ask.
"Yeah!" he snarks back at me. You wouldn't think a 3-year-old could be so condescending, but there it is. Then, again, with a whine this time, "Wash my hands!"

"Wash your own hands."

"NO!"

At which point I drag him into the bathroom, plunk him on the step-stool in front of the sink, and wash his hands (and face), while he's screaming and crying about said process.

More blah-blah about respect. Courtesy and politeness get thrown in for good measure.

DS1, having witnessed all this from the table where he is still eating his own lunch, squeaks out, "Thanks for making me lunch, Mom." And he cleared his place at the table, too.

Maybe by the time DS2 is nearly 8, I won't need to have these kind of altercations. But I know that if they keep up at the pace they've been going, I'll be dead before he reaches that fine age.

Right now, I have two errands I would very much like to do, and another couple that require a long drive up to Scottsdale,and the kids are unenthusiastic to say the least. And I'm not sure I have the energy to bully them into their sandals and then into the car. It's not fair. The teenagers down the street can't come for an hour or two, either, or else I'd just leave them all home and go myself.

All of these obstacles keep getting in the way of what could be. I can push the kids and exhaust myself even further: if I do that, I won't have the energy to drive up to Scottsdale! But if I don't go out, these things will simply not get done, and that irritates me. We already have plans for tomorrow and I don't want to put this off until Friday. Grrrrrrr.

Enough for now. I honestly don't know which way this will go, today...