I remind myself, it's a symptom. It's 3:05AM and I'm still up, reading the internet. I'm looking for the answer to a question that I can't even articulate to myself, so I'll never find it.
Since it was Halloween, I watched The Frighteners for the thousandth time, but it made me inexplicably sad this time. So by way of an antidote, I watched the first 2 episodes of the new season of Dr. Who, with Jody Whittaker as the new lady doctor. She's quite good, and I enjoyed the episodes, but they were also tinged with unexpected sadness. (I should've expected it, but I didn't.)
Now we're well into November and the rest of this week is going to be very very busy, with all the kids home, DS2's concert on Saturday, DD's birthday on Sunday!
And it's end-of-term, so I have to be on top of my grades. I'm caught up for now, but I'm giving 7th grade an assessment tomorrow that will go into the gradebook before grades close Friday morning -- in other words, I have to be efficient.
I just have a sense that's something wrong and I don't know what it is. I spent some time re-reading here (11 years of Novembers!) to see if whatever this is might be a seasonal thing, but that doesn't seems to be the case. Objectively, the only thing that I can think of that's wrong right now is the fact that I'm not sleeping, plus my stomach has been off since last night and isn't feeling too great right now. The second could be the true source of my problem, I suppose.
Ick. I'm going to bed.
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