Monday, January 12, 2004

taking the path laid before me

...
Today was an odd day, especially in here at TLC. There seemed to be an an air of unrest, but when I really stepped back from it, there were really only a very few disgruntled souls, and everyone else was just responding to them.

I don't care if there are "cliques" here, because I don't see 'em. I was lousy at that stuff in high school and refuse to go back there. As I posted in a comment somewhere around here, I just read what I want and post a reply or comment when I feel like it. Some days I just read. Some things leave me speechless with sorry, some inspire me, some make me laugh -- I admit I rarely post just to say, "Wow", or "I'm sorry", or "Congratulations!" Maybe I 'should', but that's not me. I also have a thing about not joining in "Happy Birthday" threads. Maybe I'm a jerk, I don't know, but... that's just me and I don't see any compelling (or even middling-sensible) reason to change.

So, about the path thingy... when I first started journaling here, I was agonizing over a Big Life Decision: stick with writing, or go for teaching. So I just decide to wait it out and see what came up. A few weeks go by, and one of my dear friends calls me to see if I can do some freelance tech writing for a friend of hers. Around that same time, I got off my butt and sent an email off to LCL Magazine about contributing an ongoing column.

So I heard back from friend-of-friend, and also from LCL Magazine, and it looks like those things are both "go", which makes me glad I didn't start to pursue the teaching thing, because I would have no time or energy to write! Now, of course, I have no energy (or time) to study for the teaching thing, but perhaps I will after the freelance job is finished (it's only supposed to be about 6 weeks.)

I find it very interesting that when I stopped fretting about things and let Life Decide For Me, that this is the decision that was made, the one that feels the "rightest" for now, and is certainly the most comfortable for me. Some other time I might be challenging myself on that "comfort" aspect, thinking I have become too comfortable and therefore complacent, but for right now, I'm not. There's no need to. What I'm doing now fits my life and responsibilities.

Cool.

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