written off

One of the things I explored in my notebook today was the situation on the forum, site of recent troubles. I went through quite a few interations of what I should say over there. There was a lot of crossing out. No swearing, but some name-calling. I think it was cathartic just to get them out there, even if I am the only person who will ever see them, and even if I crossed them all out immediately! (Scene: Furious scribbling -- followed immediately by furious scratching out! Horrified expression" Oh, no, I'd never actually say that!") Fortunately, none of it will ever see the light of day.

When I got home, I decided to go with making one last journal entry:

the thing about journals...
Nobody makes you read them.

It speaks volumes when a person intentionally goes out of her way to be unpleasant to someone else.

Within 20 minutes there was a comment on that entry decrying me for "sh!tting all over the forum for the past 3 days." Or something charming like that.

I was in a mood, I couldn't resist -- I posted a comment myself: "This is too easy."

But then I regretted it. I know it's really annoying to be preached at. I also know it's wrong to hand someone a gun, knowing that she will shoot herself in the foot with it. And I know it's wrong to mock someone who doesn't get it. So today I knew I was pushing things, and expected to catch some flak. But I am still surprised by the vitriol that got poured out in my journal the past few days, when I posted very brief entries with links to howdy and creds. (Apparently, making two entries in my journal is abusive to the forum in some way. I still haven't figured that one out yet.)

I can't control what other people choose to read, and I can't make them behave like adults and just ignore something they don't like, instead of having fits about it. But since it was my journal, I could control how long this ruckus persisted. As a member of the community, I should be able to put whatever I want in my own journal, but if it's going to attract an unsavory crowd I'd rather not spoil the neighborhood, so to speak. So I deleted my entire journal, including the links to the recent posts here, and added one final entry:

deleted entries
I removed my recent journal entries which some members found inflammatory.

You can reach my blog by searching for "Oasis of Sanity."

Anyone who cares to, knows where to find me.